Life is not always a bunch of roses…

 Though it was not long, you are a human being. Someone that I will not meet in this life, but God willing in the next. I only knew about you for a short time. You are so loved and cherished. Along with your seven other siblings who were not meant for this world. As I let you go, I am reminded of my blessings amidst the pain and sorrow.

I found out I was pregnant in February. We all were excited! We had had Covid early January, so I was surprised when I got a positive pregnancy test. Early March we had sickness go through our house, again. Though nobody was deathly ill, it was drawn out by the fact that it worked its way through the whole family. Unfortunately, when I went for an early ultrasound, because my labs were not showing great results, baby had stopped growing right at six weeks. The one relief was to know that it was not an ectopic pregnancy, which is a whole other level of hardship. I would have been 11 weeks this last Tuesday. Now I am miscarrying physically. As much as this is sadness and heartache, I know God has a plan.  

If I did not have my six beautiful boys here earth side, it could be easy to become bitter. I have thought about this a lot. My first ectopic pregnancy was right after Cyprian. Thinking I would only have one child, I was devastated, Franz's and my dream of a large family dashed. Even with the difficulties of miscarrying, each boy I did carry to term made me realize how blessed I really am. It really started to resonate a note of thankfulness and peace for me after I had Cornelius. He was conceived after I had four early miscarriages in 2016. He was a light at the end of a long, dark tunnel. I was struck with uncertainty yet again in 2019, though, with first an early miscarriage, and then an ectopic pregnancy that required emergency surgery. And yet, many graces came about even through the loss of our babies, as I've connected with women in a way that only those who share the experience of similar grief can.

 I hope and pray we have more little Kleins. I have a stronger sense of peace about God’s plan for our family, whether it be that we have more babies, or whether it be adopting, or whatever else God has in mind. Though I may have sadness and disappointment, I am always excited and rejoice for those who carry a baby. So, I offer this cross for those who have not been able to carry to term.

Marcellinus Patrick Klein, pray for us! Remembering also and asking the intercession of our Klein army: Cosmas James, Anastasia May, Andrew Joseph, Agatha June, Caspar Marion, Cyril Hughs, and Gianna Marie.